Time to Retire the Fishing Poles!

Wow, my crazy husband. I’m beginning to think he should give up fishing. He has Thursday off, and since it was warm out yesterday, he and Derek decide to take the canoe out fishing on the creek. This is something they always do. Derek just recently bought the canoe, so before it was my parent’s flat bottom type boat.

Well, I am sure I won’t get the story all the way straight, because it was all over the place. I am telling the story as it was told to me, so please know there could be some slight exaggerations here. These are the things their day entailed:

• They were 300-400 yards away from where the truck was parked, when they ran into rapids. They went right towards a tree branch and ran a foot of the boat into the bank and mud.
• Kyle jumped up and wrapped around the branch like a monkey and hung there as the boat started to sink. (ha! I’m picturing this in my head.)
• He waits for Derek, who is standing in the creek, to tell him how deep it is. So, he lets go.
• The canoe is wedged against the tree branch and water is gushing down both sides of the canoe past them.
• As the canoe flipped, it dumped Kyle and Derek’s cell phones, Kyle’s jacket with wallet and car keys in it, and a fishing pole. Luckily, Derek stepped on Kyle’s jacket to get the truck keys and wallet back. Not so much for the phones.
• They went back to the truck to figure out what to do and Kyle wanted to change out of his cold wet clothes before trying to get the canoe out. My poor honey didn’t think he would have to get wet again…luckily, we only live down the road.
• Due to his key chain buttons being soaked with water – there was actually a bubble in it – his truck alarm went off when he unlocked it with the key. He had to ride all the way home with it going off down the road. Everyone was looking. Ha! He said never have all of our neighbors been outside until his alarm is going off.
• They head back to get the canoe. They thought they spotted a trail that went behind these people’s property that would have been right where the canoe was. They figured they might as well ask before just doing it. It was a truck trail by a cotton field. Derek talked to the husband who couldn’t understand what he wanted, so he sent his wife to the door. Derek explained again what he wanted to see if they minded if he drove back there to get it. The lady didn’t say no, she said Hell no! ha!
• While walking through the woods on the edge, they saw at least 3 snakes. Kyle killed one of them after almost stepping on it.
• They tried to decide at the fork in the creek which way they dumped at. Kyle remembered, but the only way across was on a tree that had fallen. Kyle, Mr. Football feet, jumped one foot at a time on two branches to jump across. Derek said he couldn’t do it, but tried anyway. Off he fell into the creek. Ha!
• They finally found the canoe. Kyle started axing away on this tree limb to free the boat, because the water pressure was so much that they couldn’t get it loose. It wasn’t an average axe. It was this medieval looking curved, not sharp axe. He chopped for a long time at the branch while Derek shivered on the bank. Ha ha! The axe cut his finger, for which he thinks he needs a tetanus shot. He said it also bounced off of something and hit him in the back of the leg. Finally, he cut it loose and here comes the rest of the tree towards his head, but thank goodness if caught on something else. Geeze.
• Finally at some point, the canoe was out of the water. During all this craziness, Kyle got stung by a wasp. It was in his shirt. Derek described it as the huge red wasp that had a string hanging out of it when it flew off with no stinger. Ha! Kyle took off running and hollering across the field when it stung him. He has a huge welt on his back with a red dot on it to prove the sting.
• If they couldn’t get the canoe out, they planned to tell us that they were robbed at gun point for the canoe, wallets, and phones. I think the old lady at that house could have been a good culprit!

That is all I can remember for now, but as you can see why it is hard to remember. Sooooooo much stuff happened. I laughed the whole time he was telling me the story. I felt so bad for them. Heather and I were on the phone with one another wondering where our husbands were. Both of Kyle’s vehicles were home with a trail of soaking wet clothes in the house. Derek wasn’t home, the canoe wasn’t either, but he left her a note he would be home soon. It was 2 hours later. We were worried as we always are, because neither of their phones worked. The panic set in right as they were at the door coming home.

Then, we went to eat. That was an event in itself I think. Kyle knocked his drink and spilt it all over the table and our seat. Derek raked half of his salad into his lap while trying to eat. Ha ha ha!! I think they just should have stayed at home yesterday. And they wonder why we worry!!?!?